The Messy and Mundane

The movie Boyhood is unlike anything I've seen. It was filmed over 12 years with the same actors, so you watch an entire family age. That alone makes it a magical experience, but after it was over, I couldn't stop thinking about the life that was portrayed on the screen.

The film is a frank, uncompromising portrait of growing up. Each scene captures a moment in time, but the moments tell a story we're not used to seeing on the screen.

The story skips the typical milestones and instead focuses on the funny, awkward, often painful moments that come before and after them.

Boyhood lingers on the messy, mundane, and unresolved; the moments of fear and regret behind the framed photos.

Watching the movie was uncomfortable at times, in the way that online interactions are when someone is honest about struggles and hurts. There is a sort of minimum level of cheerfulness required—You must be this happy to ride this ride. The polite thing is to step away for awhile if you're currently falling short. We celebrate together and suffer alone.

It shouldn't be that way. If you're going through a miserable time, please know that you don't have to pretend you're not. If the last thing you need is one more email, don't hesitate to unsubscribe. And if it would ever help in some small way to just write it down, send it my way.

Boyhood is a loving reminder of the commonality found in the moments we don't talk about.